Why did Morsi try to drag Bassem Youssef, Egypt's low rent version of John Stewart, to Jail?
That was the question of the day all week last week. Conspiracy theories abounded about the reason. At face value the move seems to be without merit. I mean if there is something we know Morsi cares about, it is how the West views him. And the West responded decisively and rapidly to news of Bassem's arrest, so quickly in fact, that their response to the sectarian mini civil war seems muted in comparison. Moreover, the move gained Bassem significant solidarity in the upper middle class, a social segment Morsi needs to work hard to win over. Those who'd never heard of Bassem, and those who'd always thought he wasn't funny were all of a sudden looking for his videos on Youtube.
So why did Morsi do it? Was it because Bassem is in fact an MB agent hell bent on keeping secular political forces glued to TV's on strategic Fridays? This conspiracy theory is strangely enough, very popular. A lot of people suspect Bassem of being an undercover MB and the whole drama as an attempt to prop his credibility. Or is it an honest to God attempt at silencing the media, some good old fascism for a change?
I think the reason is much simpler, and scarier.
This is why Morsi tried to jail Bassem!
Yes, it's as simple as the "president" being insulted by a spoof of him in his ridiculous Pakistani honorary Ph.D. hat. People resist the idea that it could be that simple because it is frightening to imagine that we are being ruled by people whose main driving force is so superficial. But what most people miss is the mentality that drives a typical MB'er.
One of the most important teachings of the Muslims Brotherhood is that they are the cream of the cream of Egyptian, Arab, and Muslim society. As a result of being the cream of Muslims, they therefore believe themselves destined for mastery of the world, or what is called ostazeyat al3aalam. The manual of operations of the Muslims Brotherhood revolves around achieving this ultimate goal. There are very specific goals and standards when it comes to Muslim societies. Upper echelons are infiltrated at all levels and high calibers are enlisted (one cannot join the MB, one must be asked to join it). Slowly but surely, it is believed, the Muslim Brotherhood will come to rule such societies, and it will come to rule them with the best that such societies have ever produced.
What comes next is Messianic, vague, and esoteric. Somehow, these Muslim societies are then expected to have an orgasmic explosion of renascence in all fields as the best in these societies is allowed to flourish under the benevolent rule of its master class: The handpicked brotherhood. The non-Muslim world is also expected to somehow fall under brotherhood rule. It is not clear how this should come to be and brotherhood literature is mixed here. On the one hand, the West is supposed to stare in awe as they see the miracle in the East, and they are supposed to voluntarily want to be ruled by the master race. On the other hand there's always talk about force and power and how the brotherhood will get what the brotherhood deserves no matter what the imperialist forces do.
Compare this insanely delusional sense of superiority with the horrific facts that MB rule made the MB face. The MB had assumed (however difficult it is to believe that they are so simple) that Egypt is a resource rich country and Mubarak was personally stealing all the money. When faced with the reality of Egypt being a poor noncompetitive, and now unstable country the MB simply froze. When they woke up it was too late and too embarrassing to face people with the reality. Plan B was begging for money. The US kneeling in front of the MB would have to wait for now. Now the MB have to be "coy" and "cunning" and kneel down before the US, and Israel, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, every Western European country, and China.
Definitely not what the MB was bargaining for.
So when an opportunity comes up for Morsi to show off it had to be caught. The Pakistan moment was critical. After being denied the Washington invite he so badly coveted, Morsi had to do with a bunch of third world visits (on which he also had to beg uselessly for money). Now, here was a foreign country giving him an honorary degree and showing genuine happiness and pride in hosting him. This was not only a moment in which the MB superiority would finally show, it is a moment where international recognition materialized.
And then Morsi appeared on TV. Everyone in Egypt (but the MB) laughed. Nobody could specifically point out why they were laughing, but the way he looked was genuinely funny.
And then Bassem did his simple entrance. In a few seconds of over the top caricature he focused everything that was wrong about Morsi. The man from the Eastern Delta who spent years studying in the US, but whose English is much worse than a freshmen at the AUC. The president who wears coats two sizes too big. The guy who rearranges his genitals in front of the international press. The dude whose tolerance, exposure, and diversity training is so extensive that he said his girl doesn't wear jeans because she is not a slut. This was Morsi, and this was by extension the MB. A bunch of technically savvy, but culturally challenged and provincial people with industrial strength superiority complex.
This is it, Bassem's prosecution was not planned, it was just one more bout of impotent rage by a president as shocked by his own incompetence as the rest of the world.
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